The Guys' Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally, the guys' side of the story.
(I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear "the rules"
From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.

See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it i s just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can -

to give them a bigger laugh

TILL ALLA MAMMOR!!!

Mothers are special

Oh yes, they are

From the time we are tiny

till we are older, putting our teeth in a jar,

and just because she is not around

doesn't mean she doesn't utter a sound

her voice resonates loudly in our head

no matter if its about our behavior

or the fact that we didn't make our bed.

Mothers are always large, they loom so big in our mind

our memories of looking up at Mother at her knee

as she held our hands while we took those first hesitant

steps, to how she stood above us in the darkness of those

childhood nightmares, saying quietly, "ssshhhh, its okay, I'm here now and

it was only a dream",

and the shock one day of standing next to Mom and realizing

that time has stolen her size, shes so tiny, we think,

but no matter how the years bends her spine or stoops her forward,

you know she can just wither you with that famous glance of hers

or cast love your way across a crowded restaurant.

Mother is first love and the loss of her, is something that will

only happen one time, but will affect you every day of the rest of

your life.  Please know that I send my love and support to you

and your family and want you to know that we are all here for you.

Jag fick den här texten och tyckte såååå mycket om den...jag förlorade ju min mamma i en hjärnblödning 1995! Hon fick bli 53 år gammal!!!

Jag var gravid i fjärde månaden med hennes första barnbarn!!!

Jävligt sorgligt ska jag säga.....

Sug in och ta vara på er mamma...även om hon är ett pain...*s*

Kram

K